This week I’m delving into life & what I remember when I think back to life before the day of diagnosis. Kairos moment indeed.
The artist Do Ho Suh has a magical way of re-creating memories. Using fabric and wires he re-builds the places and spaces of his life in almost life-scale monuments. You can step through the door of his New York apartment, peer into his bath tub and spend time in his childhood home in Seoul.
It got me thinking about memories of life pre-diagnosis. I have a vivid memory of leaving an event my Mum had organised to raise money for a local boy who needed life-saving treatment. As I pulled out of Royal Tara Golf Club on the sunny day I actually said out loud how thankful I was, how blessed I am with great health. I had nothing to worry about, I was working, I was enjoying life and looking to what was ahead. A few months after that special moment that I was diagnosed with MS.
I’m remembering and recalling my memories because it is those sweet times when we breathe in life and relish our life that will be emblazoned on our mind’s eye. In five or ten or thirty years hence we can vividly recall that breath on a particular moment on a certain day and have every cell filled with what we were dreaming of. We are replete with the reminiscing.
We can give up now, disappointed that things didn’t work out the way we hoped and while we’re sitting in the memories of who we were or what might have been, life is passing us by. The end is not far from any of us and yet it is only by looking back, reaching into the past that we can appreciate just how far we have come. No matter what, to be breathing, to be alive and to have today we can, as Lucie Silvas says, wipe the dust from our face and breathe in life.
How do you deal with the what might have been? Talk with the community here or on Twitter @emmadragon